I Should Probably Tell You…
I have a terrible secret that I am going to fill you in on...this wasn't written for you. I know, I know, that sounds pretty selfish, but everything on this site was written for myself. All the preachy sounding higher road crap is reminders for myself. I write a lot of this stuff to remind me who I want to be or reinforce why I do what I do. Of course, some of the posts are just random thoughts that I felt like getting out of my head, a person needs to do that sometimes.
That all being said, you may find some contradictory information here. I am human. If I had no contradictory beliefs then I would be writing the new new testament of the bible for you. We all have conflicting beliefs or statements we make. Writing is one way that I weed them out, it is a way to get my thoughts out in black and white so that I may analyze them. When you convert your thoughts to words, it becomes much easier to see yourself as others do, to view the house from above rather than from inside. It makes things clearer and it makes changing a tad easier.
Aside from the above things, this writing is practice. The more I write the better I get at converting my thoughts into words, better at communicating with other humans. Granted, these are incremental gains, but it is an area I am willing to make slow and steady progress in. Language is the tool we use to convey thoughts, ideals, morals, inventions, love, and the list goes on and on. Being the social creatures that we are, I would love to be better at using this tool. (Fun fact: there is a big part of me that rejected that we are inherently social creatures who require other humans to thrive. I have recently realized that I was wrong. Levels of social requirements vary, but they are still there in 99.9999% of us.)
My upbringing makes me want to compulsively apologize, something like “I am sorry that this isn't actually for you...”, but by definition I am not actually sorry. It is not that I don't like you, don't worry. I mean...I don't actually know you, but I am guessing we would get along. Despite this all being for me, I am glad you are reading it. I decided to make it a public site because I know there are more people out there who think like me. I know there are people out there who are struggling with things that I used to or still am. I figured, if this writing helps me, maybe there is at least one other person out there who it can help.